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   Some people think we are in the midst of global warming when actually, we are experiencing the effects of the periodic El Nino weather pattern. For the Midwest, this means we are having a drier and warmer than usual winter. This warm weather pattern is just fine with me. I have never been a big fan of winter sports, so I do not mind if we have no snow or ice.

   I have attempted several different wintertime outdoors activities with only marginal enjoyment received from them.

   One year, we went to my sister and brother-in-law’s place in Colorado over Christmas. Everybody decided we needed to go skiing. The local ski resort was only a few miles away so we put on most of the clothes we owned and headed out for the day. Since none of my family had ever been on skis before, we thought it might be wise to take a lesson. We spent all morning learning how to put on our shoes, boots, and skis. Very little time was spent skiing. When we took a break for lunch, my sons and I decided to hit the slopes rather than waste the afternoon in class. How hard could it be. My wife decided to sit it out since she did not have as many warm clothes as the rest of us. The boys and I were decked out in our finest hunting garb so were dressed warm enough. I did notice the rest of the skiers had brightly colored coordinated outfits. We were the only ones in camouflage. Walter, the older son, took off down the mountain making it to the bottom without incident. By the end of the day, he was skiing the expert slopes. Damon and I were doing fine on the bunny slope until I suddenly forgot how to turn and ran into one of those big steel poles that hold up the ski lift. That hurt a lot. I was done for the day as it was too painful to stand up.  Damon decided he’d had enough, also. He was not willing to risk broken bones sliding down a mountain. Walter continues to ski to this day. The rest of us gave it up permanently.

   Snowmobiling is another winter sport I never really got into. One year, my wife and I went to visit her relatives in Pennsylvania. While we were there, it snowed close to four feet over a couple of days. After we got the sidewalk and roof shoveled off, my brother-in-law decided he and I needed to go snowmobiling. It was almost dark by the time we took off. Several feet of fresh powder covered everything. Most of the time, I was able to stay in the snow track Dick packed in front of me. We made it several miles from home in the middle of a large field before I got stuck. It is not that easy to lift a several hundred-pound machine back onto the packed snow while standing chest high in fresh snow. By the time we made it back to the house, our wives had all but given us up for dead. I decided snowmobiling can be cold and dangerous. If Dick had not noticed I was no longer behind him or I was out there alone, I would been there until spring.

   Ice fishing is another of those wintertime outdoors activities enjoyed by many. I have yet to find the joy in sitting on ice trying to catch a fish while freezing to death. In fairness to those that do enjoy ice fishing, I have never tried it with a heated fishing hut. I have sat on a plastic bucket with a twenty below breeze blowing down my neck. It was not fun plus I did not catch any fish. I will leave that winter sport to those willing to invest the thousands of dollars to do it the correct way.

   I am fine with El Nino keeping our weather warmer during the winter. I can find plenty of winter sports in which to participate as long as it is not cold outside.

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